Thursday, April 8, 2010

Booby Talk

Share
Everybody likes big boobies.  Am I right? 

If you don't then move to the left! Ha!

For those who love big boobies, women included - because don't tell me you don't get turned on by big bouncy boobies! You lie.  Anyway move to the left if a nerve in your nether regions doesn't jump at the sight of boobage -, stay and read. 

First let me clarify: by massive breasts I mean big like Salma Hayek - natural and firm and UP.  Not fake boobies.  Like Pamela Anderson or Katie Price.  Uh huh.

God has endowed me with pretty big boobies.  I never asked for it and I always say that it's not my prayer God answered but Honey Lips'.  He enjoys them most of the time. And sometimes I do too.  Hey I gotta take care of business too!  No judging please. 

Anyway this is about when I wanted to have a breast reduction! I know.  Crazy!

When I was growing up, I realized that my mammary glands are way bigger than my friends'.  It used to bother me.  A lot.  Because every time I step into a clothes shop I have problems finding a top.  When I find one that fits me to a T, I'll buy at least 2 in different colors.  My expensive shopping trips always ends in tears of frustration.  And then, I have men talking to my breasts instead of looking me in the eyes for a decent conversation.  I spent four years in a sex-deprived country and believe me, crossing my hands over my boobs grew tiresome after a short while.

Then I decided that when I get rich I'll have a boob reduction.  My best friend called me crazy and advised that I would grow out of it in a couple of years.  And that she liked my boobs just like they are.  That didn't convince me until I became sexually active! Like when I had sex the first time. 

Oh boy! Was I ever happy again!  Heck, I was so enchanted by them that I had to experience them on my own!  It opened up a new world to me.  It has also boosted my self-confidence (not too much because I still have other complex physical issues!  It never ends huh?!)

And the day Honey Lips decided to put his seduction plan in motion made me see stars and thanked God that there won't be any more blabbering of "I want small boobies."  Like HL keeps saying, "the way they spilled out of your bra got me hooked"; so in a way I should thank the twins!  Don't you think?

What's my bra size you ask? Ha! Let's just say big enough for HL to bury his face in between and yell "Bouyaka!" ;p

26 comments:

Gnetch said...

Hahaha! Funny post. Well, I'd like to call my boobs- humble. Yeah, I feel better now.

Stacy said...

Well I personally don't think my boobs are very big but I got measured recently and apparently, I'm a 32DD. Which seems insane. But it's right I guess because the bra I'm wearing now is a 32DD and fits perfectly - it might even be too small!

Johana Hill said...

Stacy We can exchange bras then! HAHAHA

Gnetch Humble sounds good to me! ;p

ChinkyGirLMeL said...

Hahahaha. Ok I'm jealous. Could you at least donate some to the less fortunate (my twins are malnourished)! hahahahaha

Stacy said...

There's no way we wear the same bra size if you at one point wanted a reduction! You need to get remeasured! Because I would never describe myself as being HUGE or so big that I want them reduced. They're not that big in my opinion! But a 32DD works. They're making bras differently these days or something! So seriously. Go get measured. You're probably wayyyy bigger than you think you are!

wanderingmenace said...

I used to think mine were way too small and complained about it a lot, but they are a C, so I don't really know what my problem was.

Haha, and yes-when a man knows what to do with them during fun naked times, it is really really a great thing to have them.

It's hilarious when they don't though, and they just sort of gaze at them in awe the whole time.

Either way, I raise my glass to great racks the world over!

Magpie said...

I'm the same size as Stacy and I have always LOVED them. They're so handy for turning boys into drooling messes...

I'm with Stacy though - I don't consider 32DD so big, more like slightly above average. Unfortunately the rest of me is doll-sized so they look a little ridiculous on me.

But I STILL love them. They've never let me down!

Christina In Wonderland said...

Bleagh. I hate my boobs! They're too big. Talk about back aches and a nuisance. Who gives a damn if men like them. They haven't done much for me in that aspect. :(

Boobs, man, boobs...

Stacy said...

Yeah, you can kinda see my boobs in the first picture under my "Who is Stacy" tab at the top. So you'll see that they're not GIMONGOUS. And yet, I'm a 32DD. Boobies and bras these days are changin'! It's true actually. They say the national average is a 34C these days...when long ago it was just about a B or so.

B said...

Johana... We must have been seperated at birth. Sometimes I hate my huge boobs (like when I'm running)other times I l.o.v.e. them... But I've still been thinking about a reduction for a while now. If only I had money!!

Claire Marie said...

I had small boobs all through high school... and then suddenly, once I got to college, they got huge. Still not into the D-cups, but startlingly bigger, haha. My friends tease me all the time now, but honestly, my boyfriend was ecstatic... and I love them too!

Johana Hill said...

Stacy Yes I think I need to re-measure me boobies!

ChinkyGirlMeL I would gladly give you some if it were possible!

Wanderingmenace Cheers to that! ;p

Magpie A doll-sized woman with a 32 DD? Men would drool! I would too! ;p

Christina Why don't you try Yoga (Like Stacy! ;p) or something like that to get rid of the aches? When I was a tad skinny with big boogies, my lower back used to hurt but now I'm a bit chunky so the weight doesn't bother me. And please make sure you wear good bras that won't let them puppies down.

Stacy I just looked at the picture and I like your size! Mine's fuller and I can't wear strapless with a bra. I let them loose! I don't like the way I look when I wear strapless bras or maybe I need the right ones...

Johana Hill said...

B You're right! How it hurts when I have to run. I have to hold them tight and then run.

Claire Marie Friends' opinions pale into oblivion once the boyfriend likes them huh? ;p

Nuke Girl said...

The only time I never really like them is, like you, when I'm shopping for clothes. All the twiggy models on the store posters look so slinky and streamlined and posh, and all the cute tops never fit me that way! But other than that, they're just right. :P My hips, however, are another story altogether...

pinenutsandvodka said...

THANK YOU for this post!! I also quite like my boobies, but sometimes they annoy me, for the reasons you mentioned. Thanks for reminding me of how awesome they are. And it was perfect timing too because Man Friend made a comment the other night (drunkenly of course) about how I "wasn't shy about putting my 'tits' on display" - isn't that NICE???? He obviously will not be experiencing their display for a while... it is good to know that some guys appreciate them overpowering the bra because it isn't really my fault they are on display! They cannot be contained!!! xo

The MANChild Swagga said...

*appreciating the open discussion about one of my finest pleasures.

Like HL, I am also a booby man.

Ok, I'm a guy - seems like I'm the only guy posting up here, so, I think that I will scat quickly.

But great post.

Lady Mel said...

My boobies drape down for a 22 year old. I do not know why. The left one is better than the right. Boobies are magical. :)

But on the other hand, I would want a breast reduction because all the food goes to my boobies, not my ass apparently. :(

Carina the Blogarina said...

haha! Remind me of this rhyme:
"We must, we must,
we must improve our bust!
The bigger the better,
the tighter the sweater,
the boys will come to us!"
lol

the girl in stiletto said...

lolness. i have to admit i'd love to have bigger boobies. i don't want it to be too big that it's gonna give me back pain, either. ahah! most of my big boobies friends advised that i should be thankful that my boobies are not giving me back trouble :p

Johana Hill said...

Love the rhyme Carina! ;p

OfficeGirl said...

I would have to say that since my childern my boobs are so attractive. They are at a medium to large size but not so perky. It really quite sad...What I need is a better bra. And maybe a few cocktails...

TheBigShowAtUD said...

haha. i'm glad you came around; he's probably glad too. rawr.

Susie Q said...

Of course we love big boobies.. The only time I hate them is when I'm trying to squeeze through small spaces and I just... Get stuck. Or when I wear shirts and it's slightly loose everywhere else but the buttons are shooting out at the bust. :(

What we girls gotta remember is that bra sizes aren't universal. They vary country to country and even from shop to shop.. Example: Me.
Finland:
any supermarket: 75 DD
Finrex: 75 F
UK:
M&S: 34 E
Debenhams: 34 F
Ultimo: 34/36 E
La Senza: 34 FF

And then there's the cut.

Actually, I take my words back. I WAS perfectly happy with the puppies a few weeks ago when I still fit in my 34E cup bras. Now they're too small. I'm growing exponentially and I'm scared. :(

xx

Amber said...

I'm the only female in my entire family with small boobs. I'm pretty sure my 10-year old cousin is going to have bigger jugs than me. That's going to be embarrassing.

LA Idiot said...

Hooray for boobies!

MKL said...

Big or small, I'm fine either way. Totally depends on the person, if it looks good or bad. But boobs are overrated and too many did the boob job in the 90s and now regret it. Fake big ones are not really seen as beautiful anymore, right? Small is the new big, I guess. Anyway, best is to accept yourself, whatever you have. Am I rambling? Hell yeah :P

Post a Comment