I nervously look at him.
He's smiling. Oh! He's good-looking. He's got that joie de vivre je-ne-sais-quoi about him.
However beguiling his smile is, fear fused with excitement grips my heart. Please let this go down smoothly. Please God!
"So, talk to me...", he confidently and reassuringly says.
I begin to talk and in between, he interrupts me with impertinent questions. I unconsciously touch my burning cheeks. Nothing really shocks me but somehow his probing into my private matter does.
"You look so nervous. I'm sure it's not the first time you...", he teases when I cut him off.
"No, actually it's my third time..."
"For how long you've been married?", he asks and I answer.
"Relax, it'll be over soon", and somehow that sentence didn't reassure me at all.
"Take off your pants and lie down", he orders me. Oh my!
I feel queasy. I look around. I swallow hard. I try to breathe. In and out. In and out...
I hope he won't unceremoniously chuck it inside me like it happened the first time!
I take off my pants, lie down and wait for him. He nears me and says, "Make sure you take the pills, otherwise I won't be able to help you."
I nod. Please do whatever you gotta do quickly!
I shut my eyes tightly and send a tiny prayer to the Almighty. Then I feel this cold thing on my belly.
Oh! He won't get his fingers inside me then! What a relief!
I try to peek at the monitor while he moves the transducer all over my lower belly. I can't see anything!
"All clear. No infections. No cysts. You have a normal size uterus. I'll put you on a programme and let's see how soon we can get you a baby," he finally resolves.
I let out a sigh of relief. Thank God! I thought my uterus was kidnapped by cysts! Now all I gotta do is to seriously quit smoking and put my womb to good use!
I want that baby, dammit!
P.S: I'm back on Blogger. Yes, I know I suck but hey I miss you guys over at Tumblr! It's not the same without y'all! :( Now give me a hug!! ;p
Showing posts with label I'm Stoked. Show all posts
Showing posts with label I'm Stoked. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Sunday, September 12, 2010
My Fingers Itch!
Okay. Here goes. I'll be making some changes up in this motherbitcher of a blog!
I know some of you think that it's crazy - that I'm crazy - to keep changing templates and all but did you know that I get bored easily? Like, how I hate routines or staring at the same thing every day? *shudders*
And then I'm falling deeper and deeper in love with some of the bloggers out there. I won't mention names now but after the complete layout-haulage, I'll publish a special post. Just know that you guys are my source of inspiration. I swear.
Plus, Christina gave me an award! Again, it'll come up in the next post.
Sorry for not linking right now but my fingers are itching!
I need gloves!
Peace!
P.S: Check out my Twitter profile! I put up a real picture of me but it's cropped! It's not Christmas yet, guys! Ha! Anyway, I'll take the pic down by the end of this week. Go on...;p
I know some of you think that it's crazy - that I'm crazy - to keep changing templates and all but did you know that I get bored easily? Like, how I hate routines or staring at the same thing every day? *shudders*
And then I'm falling deeper and deeper in love with some of the bloggers out there. I won't mention names now but after the complete layout-haulage, I'll publish a special post. Just know that you guys are my source of inspiration. I swear.
Plus, Christina gave me an award! Again, it'll come up in the next post.
Sorry for not linking right now but my fingers are itching!
I need gloves!
Peace!
P.S: Check out my Twitter profile! I put up a real picture of me but it's cropped! It's not Christmas yet, guys! Ha! Anyway, I'll take the pic down by the end of this week. Go on...;p
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
If Looks Could Kill, Lover Boo Will Be Charged...
Reading this from Chinky Mel Corner, the night when Honey Lips, Lover Boo and I went clubbing came to mind.
"A Margarita! Yes. I want a Margarita. And you?", I looked up again, and what do you know? LB is talking to the white dude! I elbowed her and she turned to me.
In life, there are friends and friends. Some friends, no matter how long you haven't spoken to, or no matter how far they are from you, remain special. When you meet up again, it's like 'only yesterday'.
Lover Boo and I are very tight. As the new lingo describes it, we are BFFs. The bond we share remains tight, if not tighter by each and every conversation we enjoy.
When I came back home, of course, we met and kinda fell back in the now-that-I-am-here-we-will-see-each-other-as-often-as-possible-and-call-each-other-as-much-as-we-like-which-is-every-day routine.
Honey Lips, Lover Boo and I planned a night out. We went to a very popular club in the tourist-y area. Lover Boo donned a sexy dress and a pair of high heels, whereas I wore my have-worn-so-many-times black dress, and heels. We were feeling gorgeous, especially with Honey Lips praising us and all.
(Something like the following ensued...in other words, paraphrasing...)
Lover Boo, once we reached the club, asked, "What will you guys have? I'm treating you two."
"Hennessy and Coke for me!", exclaimed Honey Lips.
"I don't know...?", I was confused. What's new?
"Okay, let's go to the bar and then you can browse the menu", Lover Boo sweetly offered.
I agreed and, she and I made our way to the bar while Honey Lips rushed to the window seat.
"Is something wrong with me? I see people shooting me weird looks...", LB asked me, sweeping a glance around us. Lover Boo is really, really attractive. You would agree too, if you saw her.
"You're pretty. That's what it is", I chuckled while perusing the menu.
"Women are staring at me! Eeekss...", she screeched.
"Isn't that what you want? Women looking at you?", I wisely cracked. "Anyway, what are you having?"
"Yes, but they are giving me weird looks, you know? And this guy on my right too. He's staring", LB whispered to me. I stopped and looked on her right and saw this white dude devouring LB with his eyes.
"Oh! He is indeed staring at you!", I whispered back.
"Erm...have you decided what you want?", Lover Boo, uneasily, asked.
"Yes babes? He wants to buy me a drink!" She was bloody amused by now.
"Accept it! Ha!", I, the Great Advisor, said. "No way! He won't leave me alone then", LB muttered. "Let's get you your drink. I'll have the same thing as well."
We ordered, collected our drinks and made our way to where Honey Lips was patiently waiting for us.
"You don't know what just happened!", I said to HL while I plopped my ass in the vacant chair next to him. LB and I then regaled HL with what happened by the bar.
"Well next time, you accept his treat, silly!", Honey Lips teased LB.
Eventually, Lover Boo did accept White Dude's treat...A Guinness! For Honey Lips!
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
My Pixelated Relatives!
Before I start whining, I think not a lot of you (if not all of you) know that Honey Lips is back in London. I'm still back home, enjoying the delicious cooking of my mother, whose aim is to make me lose weight and not the reverse. Maybe that's why she's starving me, like I'm having tea and/or coffee, and baguette for lunch! Terrible! Well not that much. I enjoy eating bread and it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know how to spread butter, right? There you go...
Anyway, between looking for jobs - I might as well make some money while I'm here -, and being home alone, I'm savoring every second of this temporary respite. And not to sound too catty, I hate being disturbed. Especially on days I'm feeling good (remember I said I was craving for some single days?) and feel like talking en-tete-a-tete with myself. Like this morning, I woke up, very chirpy.
I'm by my desk-table, just finished pulling on a cigarette (hard to kick off that smoking habit, yo!), when I heard the side gate protesting noisily.
Oh Lord! Who is it now? Not my cousin? I can't take her righteous self right now!
Don't get me wrong. I like her. She's okay. But, man, give me a break! Yesterday, we spend a couple of hours together. I got nothing more to tell her. Well, not at the moment anyway.
So I waited for her knock. I went downstairs to open the door and let her in. Forcing a happy-to-see-you grin, I invited her to come upstairs. After a half an hour of useless banter, I helped her out with her resume and all. Minutes later, she said she had to go (Oh yes!) but she was not budging! She then recommended me a movie (comedy) and I okayed. She's still not budging FFS! I had to look up the movie on YouTube (stingy arses that we are!) and she watched the first 10 minutes of the movie with me!
"This movie is so funny, and the guy is so sexy. I love him. The end is so hilarious. I was laughing so hard my belly ached!", she interrupted my murderous thoughts.
"Look, what's he going to do! He's so cute!", she continued.
"Oh no, don't tell me...I want to watch it!", I faked a protest. But no, really, if you'd already watched the movie, spare me the on-the-side comments and let me enjoy the movie. Please!
"Oh I wasn't going to tell you what'd happen next. I'm not like that", she bit back. Grrr...
A couple of deep chuckles here and there, her phone rang. It was her mother.
"Okay, I gotta go." Well, I'd hope so!
Eventually, she did leave! Like, five minutes after.
Well, hey, Internet is my sister, my brother, my cousin, my uncle, my aunty....and now my husband too! Don't blame me....seesh...
Anyway, between looking for jobs - I might as well make some money while I'm here -, and being home alone, I'm savoring every second of this temporary respite. And not to sound too catty, I hate being disturbed. Especially on days I'm feeling good (remember I said I was craving for some single days?) and feel like talking en-tete-a-tete with myself. Like this morning, I woke up, very chirpy.
I'm by my desk-table, just finished pulling on a cigarette (hard to kick off that smoking habit, yo!), when I heard the side gate protesting noisily.
Oh Lord! Who is it now? Not my cousin? I can't take her righteous self right now!
Don't get me wrong. I like her. She's okay. But, man, give me a break! Yesterday, we spend a couple of hours together. I got nothing more to tell her. Well, not at the moment anyway.
So I waited for her knock. I went downstairs to open the door and let her in. Forcing a happy-to-see-you grin, I invited her to come upstairs. After a half an hour of useless banter, I helped her out with her resume and all. Minutes later, she said she had to go (Oh yes!) but she was not budging! She then recommended me a movie (comedy) and I okayed. She's still not budging FFS! I had to look up the movie on YouTube (stingy arses that we are!) and she watched the first 10 minutes of the movie with me!
"This movie is so funny, and the guy is so sexy. I love him. The end is so hilarious. I was laughing so hard my belly ached!", she interrupted my murderous thoughts.
"Look, what's he going to do! He's so cute!", she continued.
"Oh no, don't tell me...I want to watch it!", I faked a protest. But no, really, if you'd already watched the movie, spare me the on-the-side comments and let me enjoy the movie. Please!
"Oh I wasn't going to tell you what'd happen next. I'm not like that", she bit back. Grrr...
A couple of deep chuckles here and there, her phone rang. It was her mother.
"Okay, I gotta go." Well, I'd hope so!
Eventually, she did leave! Like, five minutes after.
Well, hey, Internet is my sister, my brother, my cousin, my uncle, my aunty....and now my husband too! Don't blame me....seesh...
Tuesday, August 24, 2010
Cats And Cats
Two days ago in my mother's kitchen:
"Ugh! This cat is so annoying! It keeps jumping up in front of me!", my mum, exasperated, with a pan in her hand, muttered.
Her kitchen is rather small and we have cats coming every day. They want food and a warm place to sleep in. Where do they come from? We ain't got a clue. Sometimes, I'd come home to find one of the cats lazying on my bed.
The cat looked at me with pleading eyes.
"Dinner's not ready yet, little fellow. You have to wait", I said.
"They always come and stand in front of you while you're hustling in the kitchen!", my mum continued, very annoyed.
"So why don't you stand behind the cats?", piped in my father, who was at the kitchen table, reading the newspapers. With a dead-pan expression!
Trust my dad to make fun of everything!
Being home is lovely!
"Ugh! This cat is so annoying! It keeps jumping up in front of me!", my mum, exasperated, with a pan in her hand, muttered.
Her kitchen is rather small and we have cats coming every day. They want food and a warm place to sleep in. Where do they come from? We ain't got a clue. Sometimes, I'd come home to find one of the cats lazying on my bed.
The cat looked at me with pleading eyes.
"Dinner's not ready yet, little fellow. You have to wait", I said.
"They always come and stand in front of you while you're hustling in the kitchen!", my mum continued, very annoyed.
"So why don't you stand behind the cats?", piped in my father, who was at the kitchen table, reading the newspapers. With a dead-pan expression!
Trust my dad to make fun of everything!
Being home is lovely!
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
A Desultory Hi!
Oh Lord, ain't you guys wanna tie me up and throw me in the middle of the Pacific Ocean? You know, the sporadic appearances of myself? Tiresome, ain't it? It's okay. You can dexterize me...
Anyway, I've been spending some quality time with Lover Boo (remember her? updates on her will follow at a later date!) and she once made me listen to a current favorite song of hers and initially, it wasn't that pleasing to my ears but then I catch myself humming that tune from the time I wake up till I go to La-La Land at night.
So yes, for lack of not blogging on a regular basis, I want you guys to have a listen too! Just to remember me by...please...
So how was it?
Anyway, I've been spending some quality time with Lover Boo (remember her? updates on her will follow at a later date!) and she once made me listen to a current favorite song of hers and initially, it wasn't that pleasing to my ears but then I catch myself humming that tune from the time I wake up till I go to La-La Land at night.
So yes, for lack of not blogging on a regular basis, I want you guys to have a listen too! Just to remember me by...please...
So how was it?
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Home Sweet Home
Hiya!
I'm back but not really back.
For the first time, I brought Honey Lips home and he's enjoying every single minute of it...sleeping! Would you believe that? He doesn't feel like going out at all. I let him spend the day in bed because I know he needs the rest.
AnyImstokedway, I'm loving every minute of being home and I'll be here for a while. My old room has been transformed and I won't feel comfy until Honey Lips leaves. I'm not used to having my old bedroom shared with someone else, especially a man!
Whispers: Every time we have sex it feels so 'forbidden'! And our sex life kinda hit the roof! It's like having sex while your parents are like 3 dozen feet away. Total bliss! Like yeah mom, I'm having sex in your house and you can't say shit! Boo ya!
I'll miss my Honey Lips when he goes away. I'll join him whenever everything gets sorted out. However, I must admit I'll be glad to be on my own for a while. Since HL and I met we haven't spent one night apart. Romantic, huh? Not really. After a while, the craving to be single for at least 24 hours eats at you like fish nibbling on soggy bread.
I have more things to say but I think one of my cousins will be here any minute.
Before I leave, please know I miss you all my beautiful people.
I can't wait to read all of y'all blogs. It'll be a while but I'll catch up.
Don't I always? ;p
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Saturday, June 5, 2010
The Mercurial Wife Interviews - Who?
I'm breaking my blogging pattern! I was going to wait until Monday to publish this post but I can't contain my excitement any longer!
Remember the blog interview I did of Lizzy Marie from It's Unbeweavable? Well, I thought of making it a monthly feature! For the slow thinkers - I'm having a monthly blog feature: The Mercurial Wife Interviews. I even made a button for it. Check it out.
So who's the interviewee of the month, you ask? Most of you know her. Some of you even follow her amazing blog. To most of us, her honesty is like a breath of fresh air; and to a few, it's an annoyance. Writing for her represents more than just a passing hobby. She has a...what? Okay! I'll tell you who she is!
Drumroll please....
It's KANWAL from Kanwalful Meets World! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, she graciously agreed to sit on the pink chair! Let's get to know her better...
1. What does Kanwal mean?
Kanwal means “Water Lily”. So essentially, I am this one, big, fat, beautiful flower floating aimlessly on water.
2. When were you born? Date, month and year please.
Why do you want to know? But okay, if you insist. November 1st 1988.
I’m expecting lots of presents, now that I’ve told you guys. And maybe a surprise birthday party or two.
3. Since when did you want to do a journalism course and why?
I don’t really know. I think some time when I was in the 11th grade. And at that point I only wanted to do it because Journalism meant writing for a living. And since I was in love with writing, doing it for a living seemed awesome.
But now, I think it has a little more meaning attached to it.
4. Many have accused/accuse you of speaking ill about your own country. Does it hurt you?
No. Nothing hurts me. Except when the McDonald’s guy lies about delivering the meal in 40 minutes and does it in 60 mins instead.
5. In some Western countries with Muslims populations, the hijaab has been banned. Do you think it's a fair law?
Not at all. I STRONGLY advocate freedom of attire. If you are allowed to be naked then you sure as hell should be allowed to NOT be naked.
6. How important is it to wear a hijaab in Pakistan? To what extent does religion have a bearing on Muslim women to cover their face?It is not important at all to wear a hijaab in Pakistan. There are no laws enforcing it. Maybe in the rural areas women do it more often than in the urban areas, as it is a part of their culture.
But many Muslim women, in the urban areas in Pakistan, CHOOSE to do it because it is, in essence, preserving the dignity of the woman by not making her an object of sexual desire.
I do it because it makes me feel like I have more to give to the world than my beautiful hair or body. And when people pay attention to me despite the fact that I am not looking as physically attractive as ‘xyz’ girl in skinny jeans, I know that it is because I have the brains to rise above a bikini.
7. You meet the president of the United States. What is the first thing you'll tell him?
If it is the ex, Bush – I would probably just blow up right there and then. No not literally, you baboons. Verbal suicide bombing. I need to know HOW killing innocent people in Afghanistan – both American soldiers and Afghanis – is War against terror. It is, more appropriately War against Humanity.
If it is Obama I am meeting I would want to know what he has lined up in his “things to do”. And how he and Michelle get along so well. Taking a few relationship tips here and there won’t hurt nobody.
8. You come face to face with Osama Bin Laden. What is the first thing you'll tell him?
Dude. What is up with the picture quality? All the videos you send are so blurred. Ever heard of the Canon Vixia HF200? Heck, even cell phone cameras take better videos these days. You need to catch up with the latest technology if you want to get anywhere with your film production.
9. Describe one positive influence the Western world has brought to Pakistan.
Food? Now we get all kinds of fast food/continental cuisine in Pakistan.
On a more serious note, I think people in Pakistan, especially those in the upper strata of society, are wildly influenced by the Western World and are suffering from irrevocable identity crises.
10. Describe one positive influence Pakistan has brought to the Western world.
Uh. Um. Food? Now you get biryani and samosas in Chicago!
11. What makes you utterly happy?
Having McDonalds with Anes (My husband). Big Mac + Anes = Bliss.
12. Your written English is way beyond 'excellent'. Who or what do you have to thank for that?
No one. It's all my effort. Okay?
Well, to be honest I used to read a lot. And my mom WAS quite the evil one, when it came to making me work on my written/spoken English.
13. One regular phrase you over-use?
“You’re a baboon” and “as opposed to”. I say it ALL THE FRICKIN’ TIME.
14. Have you ever stolen anything? If yes, then what?
Yeah. I stole Anes’ heart. And I am so not giving it back.
15. Ever thought of writing a book? If yes, then what genre?
I’ve been attempting to write a book since I was ten or eleven. And to be honest, they would be about some girl going through the exact same things in life that I was going through at that stage. And after that stage was over I would pretty much discard the book. But now, I really want to write a book and I do get inspiration and ideas from time to time. I don’t however give them much consideration because they dissipate after a while and if I am going to be writing a book I want to be consistent in it. And write on something that will blow a few minds here and there. I want to write a suicide bomber of a book.
16. Teach me and your lovely readers a word in Urdu? Make it two words!
“Tu bilkul pagal hai” – means, “you are completely retarded”.
17. What makes you unique?
Well, I wouldn’t want to brag but I am pretty much above the rest of the human species. I have this sinister, yet miraculous ability to turn people into brainless baboons.
I am kind of working on a project right now, whereby I will use my blog to drain the brains out of ya’all. When I’m done I’ll rule over the world. And no one will even have the intellectual ability to pull a Sherlock Holmes.
18. Can I beg you for a picture of your favorite dress or lehnga (is that how it's called?)?
Yes, for sure lovely. Here you go.
This is a GORGEOUS piece by one of the more upscale Pakistani Designers – HSY. I took the picture off his Facebook Page. Obviously the common man a.k.a. moi can never afford such creations because they are outrageously expensive. So all I can do is dream of wearing such a beauty and then get over it.
19. Have you ever cheated while fasting? Like take a sip of water when no one's watching? ;p
Of course. Hasn’t everyone?
The last time I did it was when I was eleven though. I had just come back from playing volley-ball at school and I could simply NOT resist the temptation of having ice cold water run down my throat. God will forgive me, I think. Because I was really thirsty and small.
20. Do you believe in ghosts? If yes, then tell us why.
Well not in ghosts per se, but in the super natural. I know for a fact that the world is composed of entities apart from the ones that we actually see and encounter in every day life. I think most of my belief in the supernatural is carved out of the proof given by my religion, about their existence. But I also know lots of people who have had some kind of association/stumbled upon the supernatural beings and that is the cherry on top of my cake of belief.
Remember the blog interview I did of Lizzy Marie from It's Unbeweavable? Well, I thought of making it a monthly feature! For the slow thinkers - I'm having a monthly blog feature: The Mercurial Wife Interviews. I even made a button for it. Check it out.
So who's the interviewee of the month, you ask? Most of you know her. Some of you even follow her amazing blog. To most of us, her honesty is like a breath of fresh air; and to a few, it's an annoyance. Writing for her represents more than just a passing hobby. She has a...what? Okay! I'll tell you who she is!
Drumroll please....
It's KANWAL from Kanwalful Meets World! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, she graciously agreed to sit on the pink chair! Let's get to know her better...
Kanwal means “Water Lily”. So essentially, I am this one, big, fat, beautiful flower floating aimlessly on water.
2. When were you born? Date, month and year please.
Why do you want to know? But okay, if you insist. November 1st 1988.
I’m expecting lots of presents, now that I’ve told you guys. And maybe a surprise birthday party or two.
3. Since when did you want to do a journalism course and why?
I don’t really know. I think some time when I was in the 11th grade. And at that point I only wanted to do it because Journalism meant writing for a living. And since I was in love with writing, doing it for a living seemed awesome.
But now, I think it has a little more meaning attached to it.
4. Many have accused/accuse you of speaking ill about your own country. Does it hurt you?
No. Nothing hurts me. Except when the McDonald’s guy lies about delivering the meal in 40 minutes and does it in 60 mins instead.
5. In some Western countries with Muslims populations, the hijaab has been banned. Do you think it's a fair law?
Not at all. I STRONGLY advocate freedom of attire. If you are allowed to be naked then you sure as hell should be allowed to NOT be naked.
6. How important is it to wear a hijaab in Pakistan? To what extent does religion have a bearing on Muslim women to cover their face?It is not important at all to wear a hijaab in Pakistan. There are no laws enforcing it. Maybe in the rural areas women do it more often than in the urban areas, as it is a part of their culture.
But many Muslim women, in the urban areas in Pakistan, CHOOSE to do it because it is, in essence, preserving the dignity of the woman by not making her an object of sexual desire.
I do it because it makes me feel like I have more to give to the world than my beautiful hair or body. And when people pay attention to me despite the fact that I am not looking as physically attractive as ‘xyz’ girl in skinny jeans, I know that it is because I have the brains to rise above a bikini.
7. You meet the president of the United States. What is the first thing you'll tell him?
If it is the ex, Bush – I would probably just blow up right there and then. No not literally, you baboons. Verbal suicide bombing. I need to know HOW killing innocent people in Afghanistan – both American soldiers and Afghanis – is War against terror. It is, more appropriately War against Humanity.
If it is Obama I am meeting I would want to know what he has lined up in his “things to do”. And how he and Michelle get along so well. Taking a few relationship tips here and there won’t hurt nobody.
8. You come face to face with Osama Bin Laden. What is the first thing you'll tell him?
Dude. What is up with the picture quality? All the videos you send are so blurred. Ever heard of the Canon Vixia HF200? Heck, even cell phone cameras take better videos these days. You need to catch up with the latest technology if you want to get anywhere with your film production.
9. Describe one positive influence the Western world has brought to Pakistan.
Food? Now we get all kinds of fast food/continental cuisine in Pakistan.
On a more serious note, I think people in Pakistan, especially those in the upper strata of society, are wildly influenced by the Western World and are suffering from irrevocable identity crises.
10. Describe one positive influence Pakistan has brought to the Western world.
Uh. Um. Food? Now you get biryani and samosas in Chicago!
11. What makes you utterly happy?
Having McDonalds with Anes (My husband). Big Mac + Anes = Bliss.
12. Your written English is way beyond 'excellent'. Who or what do you have to thank for that?
No one. It's all my effort. Okay?
Well, to be honest I used to read a lot. And my mom WAS quite the evil one, when it came to making me work on my written/spoken English.
13. One regular phrase you over-use?
“You’re a baboon” and “as opposed to”. I say it ALL THE FRICKIN’ TIME.
14. Have you ever stolen anything? If yes, then what?
Yeah. I stole Anes’ heart. And I am so not giving it back.
15. Ever thought of writing a book? If yes, then what genre?
I’ve been attempting to write a book since I was ten or eleven. And to be honest, they would be about some girl going through the exact same things in life that I was going through at that stage. And after that stage was over I would pretty much discard the book. But now, I really want to write a book and I do get inspiration and ideas from time to time. I don’t however give them much consideration because they dissipate after a while and if I am going to be writing a book I want to be consistent in it. And write on something that will blow a few minds here and there. I want to write a suicide bomber of a book.
16. Teach me and your lovely readers a word in Urdu? Make it two words!
“Tu bilkul pagal hai” – means, “you are completely retarded”.
17. What makes you unique?
Well, I wouldn’t want to brag but I am pretty much above the rest of the human species. I have this sinister, yet miraculous ability to turn people into brainless baboons.
I am kind of working on a project right now, whereby I will use my blog to drain the brains out of ya’all. When I’m done I’ll rule over the world. And no one will even have the intellectual ability to pull a Sherlock Holmes.
18. Can I beg you for a picture of your favorite dress or lehnga (is that how it's called?)?
Yes, for sure lovely. Here you go.
This is a GORGEOUS piece by one of the more upscale Pakistani Designers – HSY. I took the picture off his Facebook Page. Obviously the common man a.k.a. moi can never afford such creations because they are outrageously expensive. So all I can do is dream of wearing such a beauty and then get over it.
19. Have you ever cheated while fasting? Like take a sip of water when no one's watching? ;p
Of course. Hasn’t everyone?
The last time I did it was when I was eleven though. I had just come back from playing volley-ball at school and I could simply NOT resist the temptation of having ice cold water run down my throat. God will forgive me, I think. Because I was really thirsty and small.
20. Do you believe in ghosts? If yes, then tell us why.
Well not in ghosts per se, but in the super natural. I know for a fact that the world is composed of entities apart from the ones that we actually see and encounter in every day life. I think most of my belief in the supernatural is carved out of the proof given by my religion, about their existence. But I also know lots of people who have had some kind of association/stumbled upon the supernatural beings and that is the cherry on top of my cake of belief.
Interviewer's note: Kanwal is such a delightful creature and I thank her for being so candid. It was a pleasure having you on the pink chair Kanwal! ;p Those who are not following her, check out her blog!
And watch the space for the next month issue of The Mercurial Wife Interviews...who will be sitting on the pink chair next?;p
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
It's Funny Now...
I know I keep saying I miss you guys. It's so true. I'm spending less and less time reading blogs or writing posts because I'm drowned in immigration-related paperwork, medical tests, visits to my lawyer's office and other less significant tasks. By the time I come home, my anger management issues rise to the forefront because before leaving the house in the mornings I don't make the bed. I get rushed. So yes, coming back home to an unmade bed, a laundry basket on the verge of exploding, and then socks and shoes scattered everywhere on the bedroom floor - that's not a pretty sight nor a mood lightener.
Anyway, I have to tell you all something that happened to me - well, two somethings actually - on Friday night. Honey Lips and I went to that Pissy Leaks Club. Remember? We went there because everything is back to normal (uh huh) and we thought of spending only a couple of hours in said club.
It was a hot night and I chose to wear a short black, strapless dress. Sans bra. I usually flat-ironed my hair when I go clubbing but that night, I didn't have the energy to straighten out my unruly hair. With a few twists, I made a knot and let the ends sit on my left shoulder. I was looking different and Honey Lips' libido kinda skyrocketed and he wouldn't stop groping me in the club. For the first time, that irritated me. After a few awkward maneouvres, I managed to make him stand in front of me, while I embraced him from the back.
"Stay here. I'll be behind you this time. And hug you...", I shouted at him. I had to. The music was loud.
The music picked up after a while and we were dancing like crazy people. I slightly moved away from him so I could catch a breath or two when I felt this sudden rush of cold air in my bosom area. Panicky, I looked down and OMG! there they were! My titsoruses proudly out for all to see! The shame ...you know how they say something about wishing the floor would open and swallow you up stuff? Yes, that! It was horrible.
Not quickly enough, I pulled my dress up and held tightly onto my unsuspecting husband and shamefully looked around to see if anyone saw me and my girls. Unfortunately, I couldn't tell because it was too dark. But then I heard the women dancing next to us chuckling. Oh Sweet Dickens!
Half an hour later, Honey Lips suggested we leave the dancefloor and go up in the VIP lounge. I promptly nodded and followed him. I didn't tell him anything...yet. As soon as we stepped into the VIP section, we met a few friends of his, ones I've never met before. So HL begun the necessary introductions. I shook hands with them and smiled when one of the women pleasantly exclaimed, with my hand still in hers: "Oh your hand is so smooth!".
"Excuse me?", I said.
She turned to Honey Lips and said, "Her hands are very soft and smooth. She doesn't work hard enough", and then she started to laugh!
"Mine are soft and smooth too", Honey Lips breathed out, "and I work hard. My wife doesn't need to work hard. I love them soft and smooth by the way."
Old bitch!
I was in too good a mood to let her rattle my cage. Honey Lips and I spent the rest of the night, by the bar, laughing like crazy people in love...with the sad titepisode, willingly pushed to the back of my mind...
Anyway, I have to tell you all something that happened to me - well, two somethings actually - on Friday night. Honey Lips and I went to that Pissy Leaks Club. Remember? We went there because everything is back to normal (uh huh) and we thought of spending only a couple of hours in said club.
It was a hot night and I chose to wear a short black, strapless dress. Sans bra. I usually flat-ironed my hair when I go clubbing but that night, I didn't have the energy to straighten out my unruly hair. With a few twists, I made a knot and let the ends sit on my left shoulder. I was looking different and Honey Lips' libido kinda skyrocketed and he wouldn't stop groping me in the club. For the first time, that irritated me. After a few awkward maneouvres, I managed to make him stand in front of me, while I embraced him from the back.
"Stay here. I'll be behind you this time. And hug you...", I shouted at him. I had to. The music was loud.
The music picked up after a while and we were dancing like crazy people. I slightly moved away from him so I could catch a breath or two when I felt this sudden rush of cold air in my bosom area. Panicky, I looked down and OMG! there they were! My titsoruses proudly out for all to see! The shame ...you know how they say something about wishing the floor would open and swallow you up stuff? Yes, that! It was horrible.
Not quickly enough, I pulled my dress up and held tightly onto my unsuspecting husband and shamefully looked around to see if anyone saw me and my girls. Unfortunately, I couldn't tell because it was too dark. But then I heard the women dancing next to us chuckling. Oh Sweet Dickens!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Half an hour later, Honey Lips suggested we leave the dancefloor and go up in the VIP lounge. I promptly nodded and followed him. I didn't tell him anything...yet. As soon as we stepped into the VIP section, we met a few friends of his, ones I've never met before. So HL begun the necessary introductions. I shook hands with them and smiled when one of the women pleasantly exclaimed, with my hand still in hers: "Oh your hand is so smooth!".
"Excuse me?", I said.
She turned to Honey Lips and said, "Her hands are very soft and smooth. She doesn't work hard enough", and then she started to laugh!
"Mine are soft and smooth too", Honey Lips breathed out, "and I work hard. My wife doesn't need to work hard. I love them soft and smooth by the way."
Old bitch!
I was in too good a mood to let her rattle my cage. Honey Lips and I spent the rest of the night, by the bar, laughing like crazy people in love...with the sad titepisode, willingly pushed to the back of my mind...
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
I'm Awesome!
Oh fuck schmuck!
Have you checked out my Facebook Fan page? No? Check it out and become a fan. Click on the Wibiya toolbar below and click on the Like button.
Have you noticed anything? The landing page of my Fan page has been re-vamped! It's a new trick I've learned on a website where it briefly explains how to create your own landing page! If you're interested in having one of your own, email me!
Last week, I helped Kanwal with her blog layout. See here. I won't mind doing yours. Yes, you heard right. If you're not totally satisfied with your current Blogger theme buzz me! Generous Me will help you. Plus, you don't have to pay me a single dime! Ain't that rad? ;p
OK. So now that's out of the way, let me wish you all a Happy Tuesday!It's one day away from Hump Day!
Have you checked out my Facebook Fan page? No? Check it out and become a fan. Click on the Wibiya toolbar below and click on the Like button.
Have you noticed anything? The landing page of my Fan page has been re-vamped! It's a new trick I've learned on a website where it briefly explains how to create your own landing page! If you're interested in having one of your own, email me!
Last week, I helped Kanwal with her blog layout. See here. I won't mind doing yours. Yes, you heard right. If you're not totally satisfied with your current Blogger theme buzz me! Generous Me will help you. Plus, you don't have to pay me a single dime! Ain't that rad? ;p
OK. So now that's out of the way, let me wish you all a Happy Tuesday!It's one day away from Hump Day!
Friday, April 30, 2010
A Blog Meme, Plus One Surprise
Happy Friday my wonderful people.
Is it me or is time really flying?
Anyway, I've been tagged! By the lovely ChinkyMel! I know! Awesome, right? I'm so excited. *doing the wiggle dance*
*gasp* Pheww!
Inhale...exhale...inhale...exhale...
Before I start the meme (oh yes!), I would like to thank ChinkyMel for tagging me. For those who don't read her blog, you're missing out. Big time. And those who follow her know how funny, smart and down-to-earth she is. Her corner is always full of delight. However, she's been sick for a while now, she got Tonsillitis. Pray she recovers quickly because I miss her amazing blog posts. Show her some love, will ya peeps?
Now, on to the meme...(read on...I have another exciting announcement!)
1. A vampire or a wizard? (and why???)
I'd choose to be a wizard. Just like ChinkyMel I can't see myself sucking blood! Ewww...Now dabbling with magic potions sounds fun! ;p
2. If you could change one thing about you, what would it be - if anything?
I'd like to change my height! Currently, I weigh around 140 pounds. If I were taller, I'd be happy.
3. Would you rather live like a rock star or like a president? (in other words: fun or power?)
Being the president of a country is too much of a job for lazy me. The innumerable responsibilities that comes with the job is a headache which I can live without. Living the life of a rock star is better. No rules. I can do what I want. And the best thing is to have people going crazy over me! Hehehehe...
4. What's your favorite cartoon character?
I got two! Homer Simpson and Stewie Griffin. Need I say more? ;p
5. What's your (most) guilty pleasure?
It's not chocolate. It's not ice-cream. Read my previous post!
6. If you were a song, what would it be?
It'd be either Self Control by Laura Branigan or Trippin' by Toni Braxton.
7. What's your biggest dream?
To be successful in all my endeavors.
8. Do you prefer to be the one who asks questions or the one who answers them, and why?
The one who asks questions definitely. I don't have a particular reason why but by letting someone else asking you questions gives that person control over you no? I don't like being controlled.
9. What is your biggest turn off and turn on?
(In a sexual context) Turn off - Farts! Turn on - The eyes.
(In a general context) Turn off - Nose picking in public, stupidity, nasty B.O and a ghetto attitude when you're not from the ghetto. Turn on - Cleanliness, intelligence and a sense of humor.
10. Have you broken any law?
If stealing books from the school library counts, then yes. Ha!
Now I'm tagging:
Amber from Nostomanic
Jewels from A Bitchfest! A Lovefest!
Christina from Christina In Wonderland
Carina from Carina The Blogarina
Lady Mel from Lights. Camera. Action.
Krissy from I Am Krissy
Anyone is welcome to do the meme! ;p
And now my exciting news! You know Lizzy Marie from It's Unbeweavable? Of course you do! Well yesterday I asked her for an interview and she agreed!!!! Ain't that awesome? So watch the space...because soon you can read her interview on my blog!
Enjoy your weekend my wonderful people!
Is it me or is time really flying?
Anyway, I've been tagged! By the lovely ChinkyMel! I know! Awesome, right? I'm so excited. *doing the wiggle dance*
*gasp* Pheww!
Inhale...exhale...inhale...exhale...
Before I start the meme (oh yes!), I would like to thank ChinkyMel for tagging me. For those who don't read her blog, you're missing out. Big time. And those who follow her know how funny, smart and down-to-earth she is. Her corner is always full of delight. However, she's been sick for a while now, she got Tonsillitis. Pray she recovers quickly because I miss her amazing blog posts. Show her some love, will ya peeps?
Now, on to the meme...(read on...I have another exciting announcement!)
1. A vampire or a wizard? (and why???)
I'd choose to be a wizard. Just like ChinkyMel I can't see myself sucking blood! Ewww...Now dabbling with magic potions sounds fun! ;p
2. If you could change one thing about you, what would it be - if anything?
I'd like to change my height! Currently, I weigh around 140 pounds. If I were taller, I'd be happy.
3. Would you rather live like a rock star or like a president? (in other words: fun or power?)
Being the president of a country is too much of a job for lazy me. The innumerable responsibilities that comes with the job is a headache which I can live without. Living the life of a rock star is better. No rules. I can do what I want. And the best thing is to have people going crazy over me! Hehehehe...
4. What's your favorite cartoon character?
I got two! Homer Simpson and Stewie Griffin. Need I say more? ;p
5. What's your (most) guilty pleasure?
It's not chocolate. It's not ice-cream. Read my previous post!
6. If you were a song, what would it be?
It'd be either Self Control by Laura Branigan or Trippin' by Toni Braxton.
7. What's your biggest dream?
To be successful in all my endeavors.
8. Do you prefer to be the one who asks questions or the one who answers them, and why?
The one who asks questions definitely. I don't have a particular reason why but by letting someone else asking you questions gives that person control over you no? I don't like being controlled.
9. What is your biggest turn off and turn on?
(In a sexual context) Turn off - Farts! Turn on - The eyes.
(In a general context) Turn off - Nose picking in public, stupidity, nasty B.O and a ghetto attitude when you're not from the ghetto. Turn on - Cleanliness, intelligence and a sense of humor.
10. Have you broken any law?
If stealing books from the school library counts, then yes. Ha!
Now I'm tagging:
Amber from Nostomanic
Jewels from A Bitchfest! A Lovefest!
Christina from Christina In Wonderland
Carina from Carina The Blogarina
Lady Mel from Lights. Camera. Action.
Krissy from I Am Krissy
Anyone is welcome to do the meme! ;p
And now my exciting news! You know Lizzy Marie from It's Unbeweavable? Of course you do! Well yesterday I asked her for an interview and she agreed!!!! Ain't that awesome? So watch the space...because soon you can read her interview on my blog!
Enjoy your weekend my wonderful people!
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Underwear: His And Hers
Early morning Honey Lips and I stepped out to pay some bills as it is month-end and all. We reached the post office and was waiting for the counter-lady to bring the necessary paperwork when Honey Lips said,
So clichéd but he deserved the sloppy kisses I rained on his cheeks and ears right there in the post office.
But before we reached the post office, we were in the car, stopped at a zebra crossing, when this lady wearing a tight skirt walking by on the sidewalk a few metres ahead of us.
"Look at her panties. She's wearing granny panties. You see why you must wear thong?", Honey Lips tells me in his mr-know-it-all-voice.
"I'm a panty pervert. I like looking at women's panties. It's interesting to know what kind of panties they wear. Granny thongs!", he keeps on blaberring while I chuckle.
You ask why I didn't smash him on his head?
Well, first off, it's not the first time, my husband made his eldritch (he claims to be a mutant) fondness for panties be known to me. Secondly, I can't really slap him because uh, most of the times, I uh...wear his underwear.
Hold on! Let me explain!
Well Honey Lips hates speedos. One day, he was doing his own clothes-shopping when he mistakenly put two packs of speedos in the check-out basket. He hustles when he shops. When he reached home I saw the speedos and I was a bit surprised. He was surprised too. And you know he never wore 'em. He told me to 'pack it up'. What he means is 'put it in your underwear drawer'. I did. In the meantime I'm stocking up on thongs because I know how he loves them. Then came my period.
Uh huh...I'm out of granny panties and I'm a pad girl (I'm not ashamed of that!) so of course I saw the speedos. Plus, they are in dark colors. Better for me. They are so comfy! When I would be home alone, I would have nothing else on but my speedo. Sometimes, I wear 'em even after my period is done!
So yeah, I can't admonish him for his guilty pleasure because of my own nasty secret. Which is not a secret anymore.
Now you can laugh at me!
"When you wear yellow
You turn on this fellow
My insides go jello
And makes me feel mellow"
So clichéd but he deserved the sloppy kisses I rained on his cheeks and ears right there in the post office.
But before we reached the post office, we were in the car, stopped at a zebra crossing, when this lady wearing a tight skirt walking by on the sidewalk a few metres ahead of us.
"Look at her panties. She's wearing granny panties. You see why you must wear thong?", Honey Lips tells me in his mr-know-it-all-voice.
"I'm a panty pervert. I like looking at women's panties. It's interesting to know what kind of panties they wear. Granny thongs!", he keeps on blaberring while I chuckle.
You ask why I didn't smash him on his head?
Well, first off, it's not the first time, my husband made his eldritch (he claims to be a mutant) fondness for panties be known to me. Secondly, I can't really slap him because uh, most of the times, I uh...wear his underwear.
Hold on! Let me explain!
Well Honey Lips hates speedos. One day, he was doing his own clothes-shopping when he mistakenly put two packs of speedos in the check-out basket. He hustles when he shops. When he reached home I saw the speedos and I was a bit surprised. He was surprised too. And you know he never wore 'em. He told me to 'pack it up'. What he means is 'put it in your underwear drawer'. I did. In the meantime I'm stocking up on thongs because I know how he loves them. Then came my period.
Uh huh...I'm out of granny panties and I'm a pad girl (I'm not ashamed of that!) so of course I saw the speedos. Plus, they are in dark colors. Better for me. They are so comfy! When I would be home alone, I would have nothing else on but my speedo. Sometimes, I wear 'em even after my period is done!
So yeah, I can't admonish him for his guilty pleasure because of my own nasty secret. Which is not a secret anymore.
Now you can laugh at me!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
A Tiny Update
Hey my beauties!
I just finished with the layout. I got some minor tweaks to take care of and then, that's it!
Yesterday I spent the whole day with Honey Lips and consequently I didn't check any of your blogs. I'll get to that soon! ;p
Anyway check out the pictures below. They belong to a friend of Honey Lips.
Aren't they cute?! ;p
I just finished with the layout. I got some minor tweaks to take care of and then, that's it!
Yesterday I spent the whole day with Honey Lips and consequently I didn't check any of your blogs. I'll get to that soon! ;p
Anyway check out the pictures below. They belong to a friend of Honey Lips.
Aren't they cute?! ;p
Monday, April 19, 2010
Happy Monday Everyone
It's been raining since I woke up this morning and it looks like the clouds ain't going nowhere today. As much as I hate the humidity the rain brings, I welcome the grey clouds. I'm hoping I can retire to my bed for the whole day and watch TV! ;p
Yesterday I decided to get a new layout for this blog. I'm still working on it. I finally caved in and going pink all the way baby! Well my template is not 100% pink but you know IT IS PINK! Ha!
And I'll post something maybe tomorrow.
Happy Monday everyone!
Yesterday I decided to get a new layout for this blog. I'm still working on it. I finally caved in and going pink all the way baby! Well my template is not 100% pink but you know IT IS PINK! Ha!
And I'll post something maybe tomorrow.
Happy Monday everyone!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
And That's How The Cookie Crumbles!
"You can come in my room and chill", Honey Lips sweetly said.
"OK", I shrugged.
We were alone in his bedroom, my best friend was sent to the cyber cafe to fax something to someone. She'd be gone for a while and Honey Lips was horny.
This is the first time he decided to make a move on unsuspecting me...
"Would you like a massage? A sensual message?", he asked me. What in the world is a sensual massage? Don't all massages be the same?
I looked at him uncertainly and he reassured me, "Don't worry. I gave one to BFF and there's no sex involved."
"BFF had a sensual massage? When? She didn't tell me?", I felt betrayed.
"It was nothing. I'll give you one if you want...?", he then paused, waiting for my answer.
"Alright." If BFF got one I'll have one too you know. Of course I wasn't thinking that out loud.
I went to his bed and lied down on my belly, fully clothed. I had on, a pair of blue jeans and a red top. He lifted my top and started rubbing down his hands on my back. Very gently. Started to knead my bones and muscles on my back. I was in heaven.
"You like it?", he whispered. "Mmmmm...", I tried to nod.
"Would you like me to take off your top?"
"Mmmm..."
I was completely lost to his touch and couldn't resist him. I was in a lull when...
Whoa! My eyes snapped open and,
"Relax, I wouldn't do anything you don't want me to", he coaxed while his fingers were fumbling with my bra.
"Turn over...", he continued. What the hell? No sex my ass! I know where that's going...
I did turn my spellbound ass over. He removed my bra and BAM! He gasped and I looked at him. His smoldering eyes were black with desire. Those eyes made me feel like a wanton hussy. The Moist Haven started to urgently tingle. He closed his mouth over my throbbing nipples and began to suck...
Nothing matters right now. I want him with every bone in my body. Oh yes...don't stop...
Then licking his way down to Moist Haven, his lips landed on it. It was pouring down there in Moist Haven. I could hear beating drums in my ears.
He ate it like a starved child, with me covering my face with one of his pillows. I didn't want him to look at the blissfully-contorted expressions on my face...I started to wriggle under his mouth until my world burst into a euphoric kaleidoscope of colors...
With my back arched, I reached for his belt and unzipped his pants.
And what followed next went so fast that I was left stunned, craving for more. He whipped out the Johnson and dived in once and pulled out!
What the fuck? Where is...? Why...? Uh...what...?!
I roused from the comatose-like state I was fiercely pushed in and looked at him pulling up his pants and buckling up.
"What's wrong?", I queried, my mouth dry and the Africans still beating drums somewhere down there in Moist Haven.
"That's a sensual massage!", he explained.
"Oh...!" That's it?
Much, much later, he told me that he just wanted to give me a taste and besides, I was seeing someone else. And no, BFF never got any sensual massage from him, which I already knew by then because I asked BFF if it were true.
Honey Lips knew that if he didn't bend the truth a little about BFF getting a sensual massage I would have never gone for a sensual massage! Damn right I wouldn't have and I would have missed 6 months's worth of blissful sex!
And that folks, that's how the cookie crumbled....
P.S: That was a long damn post! Phew..! If you've made it until the end then by God you must be soaking wet right now. Else, you have a problem. Your sex drive needs oiling. Or something...
"OK", I shrugged.
We were alone in his bedroom, my best friend was sent to the cyber cafe to fax something to someone. She'd be gone for a while and Honey Lips was horny.
This is the first time he decided to make a move on unsuspecting me...
"Would you like a massage? A sensual message?", he asked me. What in the world is a sensual massage? Don't all massages be the same?
I looked at him uncertainly and he reassured me, "Don't worry. I gave one to BFF and there's no sex involved."
"BFF had a sensual massage? When? She didn't tell me?", I felt betrayed.
"It was nothing. I'll give you one if you want...?", he then paused, waiting for my answer.
"Alright." If BFF got one I'll have one too you know. Of course I wasn't thinking that out loud.
I went to his bed and lied down on my belly, fully clothed. I had on, a pair of blue jeans and a red top. He lifted my top and started rubbing down his hands on my back. Very gently. Started to knead my bones and muscles on my back. I was in heaven.
"You like it?", he whispered. "Mmmmm...", I tried to nod.
"Would you like me to take off your top?"
"Mmmm..."
I was completely lost to his touch and couldn't resist him. I was in a lull when...
Whoa! My eyes snapped open and,
"Relax, I wouldn't do anything you don't want me to", he coaxed while his fingers were fumbling with my bra.
"Turn over...", he continued. What the hell? No sex my ass! I know where that's going...
I did turn my spellbound ass over. He removed my bra and BAM! He gasped and I looked at him. His smoldering eyes were black with desire. Those eyes made me feel like a wanton hussy. The Moist Haven started to urgently tingle. He closed his mouth over my throbbing nipples and began to suck...
Nothing matters right now. I want him with every bone in my body. Oh yes...don't stop...
Then licking his way down to Moist Haven, his lips landed on it. It was pouring down there in Moist Haven. I could hear beating drums in my ears.
He ate it like a starved child, with me covering my face with one of his pillows. I didn't want him to look at the blissfully-contorted expressions on my face...I started to wriggle under his mouth until my world burst into a euphoric kaleidoscope of colors...
With my back arched, I reached for his belt and unzipped his pants.
And what followed next went so fast that I was left stunned, craving for more. He whipped out the Johnson and dived in once and pulled out!
What the fuck? Where is...? Why...? Uh...what...?!
I roused from the comatose-like state I was fiercely pushed in and looked at him pulling up his pants and buckling up.
"What's wrong?", I queried, my mouth dry and the Africans still beating drums somewhere down there in Moist Haven.
"That's a sensual massage!", he explained.
"Oh...!" That's it?
Much, much later, he told me that he just wanted to give me a taste and besides, I was seeing someone else. And no, BFF never got any sensual massage from him, which I already knew by then because I asked BFF if it were true.
Honey Lips knew that if he didn't bend the truth a little about BFF getting a sensual massage I would have never gone for a sensual massage! Damn right I wouldn't have and I would have missed 6 months's worth of blissful sex!
And that folks, that's how the cookie crumbled....
P.S: That was a long damn post! Phew..! If you've made it until the end then by God you must be soaking wet right now. Else, you have a problem. Your sex drive needs oiling. Or something...
Sunday, April 11, 2010
I'm Crazy...But You Know That!
But how much of a nuthead am I really? You don't know that!
Now before you read the following, let me warn you that this post is of a delicate subject and if you're eating, come back after you're done stuffing your face.
Okay. You ready?
Alright...
Recently, I've been smelling my own panties...and I like the way it smells!
Hey put that phone down! I'm perfectly sane and I do not need to be admitted to Nutty Hospital! And don't try smelling your panties NOW! You can do it later. After you finish reading this post.
So tell me. Have you ever tried to smell your own knickers? Especially after you've washed the vajay after sex?
That pleasant smell comes only after sex. And stays for a few days.
For the first time, yesterday, I confessed to Honey Lips and he just laughed and called me a freak!
"I like the way my pussy juice smells after we done fucking", I excitedly confessed.
"You're a freak!", he chuckles.
"I think it's because my juice is mixed up with yours. And I love the way your cock smells after sex.", I continued.
"Tell me that again tonight!", he suggests.
But we didn't have sex last night because we both fell asleep!
He took care of business today though and Lordy Lord I can't tell you how much that scent excites my senses.
AnyIamnottellingyouanotherwordabouttodayssexway, ain't it a motherbitcher when after lovemaking you go to wash the poumpoum and one drop of pussy juice trickles down your legs and then you gotta step back in the shower and wash again?! Totally annoying, isn't it?
Now before you read the following, let me warn you that this post is of a delicate subject and if you're eating, come back after you're done stuffing your face.
Okay. You ready?
Alright...
Recently, I've been smelling my own panties...and I like the way it smells!
Hey put that phone down! I'm perfectly sane and I do not need to be admitted to Nutty Hospital! And don't try smelling your panties NOW! You can do it later. After you finish reading this post.
So tell me. Have you ever tried to smell your own knickers? Especially after you've washed the vajay after sex?
That pleasant smell comes only after sex. And stays for a few days.
For the first time, yesterday, I confessed to Honey Lips and he just laughed and called me a freak!
"I like the way my pussy juice smells after we done fucking", I excitedly confessed.
"You're a freak!", he chuckles.
"I think it's because my juice is mixed up with yours. And I love the way your cock smells after sex.", I continued.
"Tell me that again tonight!", he suggests.
But we didn't have sex last night because we both fell asleep!
He took care of business today though and Lordy Lord I can't tell you how much that scent excites my senses.
AnyIamnottellingyouanotherwordabouttodayssexway, ain't it a motherbitcher when after lovemaking you go to wash the poumpoum and one drop of pussy juice trickles down your legs and then you gotta step back in the shower and wash again?! Totally annoying, isn't it?
Friday, April 9, 2010
Let's Take A Look At Some Pictures, Shall We?
Yesterday, Carina from The Blogette posted the photograph of a beautiful sunset she captured on film on her trip to Cafe Del Mar. Actually, it's a blog meme where you have to open your Pictures folder and choose the 10th picture from the first album and publish it on your blog, accompanied by a few words about the said picture.
Well, I'm not participating in the meme but looking at the sunset reminded me of that Easter week-end Honey Lips and I spent on a very small island last year. It was magical.
We spent the night in a wooden cabin facing the ocean. I'm not good with words when it comes to describe places so let's have a look at the pictures, shall we? ;p
The last two pictures are of the sunrise. We woke up early and went on the balcony to watch the sunrise while having a smoke or two. I wished time would have stopped then. It was subliminal. The day started out with grey, heavy clouds but by 11 o'clock, the sun was shining brightly and we made our way to a popular beach.
Well, I'm not participating in the meme but looking at the sunset reminded me of that Easter week-end Honey Lips and I spent on a very small island last year. It was magical.
We spent the night in a wooden cabin facing the ocean. I'm not good with words when it comes to describe places so let's have a look at the pictures, shall we? ;p
The last two pictures are of the sunrise. We woke up early and went on the balcony to watch the sunrise while having a smoke or two. I wished time would have stopped then. It was subliminal. The day started out with grey, heavy clouds but by 11 o'clock, the sun was shining brightly and we made our way to a popular beach.
One of the beaches on the small island...
I wish I could put up more photos but you know, with that anonymity ish and all...anyway my lovelies, keep drooling while I go clean my house! ;p
Of course, you know you gotta click on the picture to biggify (stealing ChinkyMel's word here! ;p) it, right? Right...Happy Friday!
**UPDATE**
I've been Blog-crushed by Undomestic Chica. Head over to her blog and read my mini-interview please! Thank you. And do read her blog as well. She's funny, smart and beautiful. And undomestic...;p
**UPDATE**
I've been Blog-crushed by Undomestic Chica. Head over to her blog and read my mini-interview please! Thank you. And do read her blog as well. She's funny, smart and beautiful. And undomestic...;p
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Booby Talk
Everybody likes big boobies. Am I right?
If you don't then move to the left! Ha!
For those who love big boobies, women included - because don't tell me you don't get turned on by big bouncy boobies! You lie. Anyway move to the left if a nerve in your nether regions doesn't jump at the sight of boobage -, stay and read.
First let me clarify: by massive breasts I mean big like Salma Hayek - natural and firm and UP. Not fake boobies. Like Pamela Anderson or Katie Price. Uh huh.
God has endowed me with pretty big boobies. I never asked for it and I always say that it's not my prayer God answered but Honey Lips'. He enjoys them most of the time. And sometimes I do too. Hey I gotta take care of business too! No judging please.
Anyway this is about when I wanted to have a breast reduction! I know. Crazy!
When I was growing up, I realized that my mammary glands are way bigger than my friends'. It used to bother me. A lot. Because every time I step into a clothes shop I have problems finding a top. When I find one that fits me to a T, I'll buy at least 2 in different colors. My expensive shopping trips always ends in tears of frustration. And then, I have men talking to my breasts instead of looking me in the eyes for a decent conversation. I spent four years in a sex-deprived country and believe me, crossing my hands over my boobs grew tiresome after a short while.
Then I decided that when I get rich I'll have a boob reduction. My best friend called me crazy and advised that I would grow out of it in a couple of years. And that she liked my boobs just like they are. That didn't convince me until I became sexually active! Like when I had sex the first time.
Oh boy! Was I ever happy again! Heck, I was so enchanted by them that I had to experience them on my own! It opened up a new world to me. It has also boosted my self-confidence (not too much because I still have other complex physical issues! It never ends huh?!)
And the day Honey Lips decided to put his seduction plan in motion made me see stars and thanked God that there won't be any more blabbering of "I want small boobies." Like HL keeps saying, "the way they spilled out of your bra got me hooked"; so in a way I should thank the twins! Don't you think?
What's my bra size you ask? Ha! Let's just say big enough for HL to bury his face in between and yell "Bouyaka!" ;p
If you don't then move to the left! Ha!
For those who love big boobies, women included - because don't tell me you don't get turned on by big bouncy boobies! You lie. Anyway move to the left if a nerve in your nether regions doesn't jump at the sight of boobage -, stay and read.
First let me clarify: by massive breasts I mean big like Salma Hayek - natural and firm and UP. Not fake boobies. Like Pamela Anderson or Katie Price. Uh huh.
God has endowed me with pretty big boobies. I never asked for it and I always say that it's not my prayer God answered but Honey Lips'. He enjoys them most of the time. And sometimes I do too. Hey I gotta take care of business too! No judging please.
Anyway this is about when I wanted to have a breast reduction! I know. Crazy!
When I was growing up, I realized that my mammary glands are way bigger than my friends'. It used to bother me. A lot. Because every time I step into a clothes shop I have problems finding a top. When I find one that fits me to a T, I'll buy at least 2 in different colors. My expensive shopping trips always ends in tears of frustration. And then, I have men talking to my breasts instead of looking me in the eyes for a decent conversation. I spent four years in a sex-deprived country and believe me, crossing my hands over my boobs grew tiresome after a short while.
Then I decided that when I get rich I'll have a boob reduction. My best friend called me crazy and advised that I would grow out of it in a couple of years. And that she liked my boobs just like they are. That didn't convince me until I became sexually active! Like when I had sex the first time.
Oh boy! Was I ever happy again! Heck, I was so enchanted by them that I had to experience them on my own! It opened up a new world to me. It has also boosted my self-confidence (not too much because I still have other complex physical issues! It never ends huh?!)
And the day Honey Lips decided to put his seduction plan in motion made me see stars and thanked God that there won't be any more blabbering of "I want small boobies." Like HL keeps saying, "the way they spilled out of your bra got me hooked"; so in a way I should thank the twins! Don't you think?
What's my bra size you ask? Ha! Let's just say big enough for HL to bury his face in between and yell "Bouyaka!" ;p
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Amazing Finds
I need to really sit down and write a unique blog post but in the meantime, here's a post dedicated to other interesting stuff I found on the Internet. ;p
[via]
3. Pink Dolphins
For more, visit here.
4. Pretty Mugs
More original mugs here.
5. Digital Flower
More details here.
6. Books Installation
Visit this site for more.
7. Creative and Modern Bathtubs
Feast your eyes on more unique bathtubs here.
8. Liger (Half-breed lion and tiger)
Read more here.
That's all for today folks! ;p
