Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Now What Should This Title Be?

I nervously look at him.

He's smiling. Oh! He's good-looking.  He's got that joie de vivre je-ne-sais-quoi about him.

However beguiling his smile is, fear fused with excitement grips my heart.  Please let this go down smoothly.  Please God!

"So, talk to me...", he confidently and reassuringly says.

I begin to talk and in between, he interrupts me with impertinent questions.  I unconsciously touch my burning cheeks.  Nothing really shocks me but somehow his probing into my private matter does.

"You look so nervous.  I'm sure it's not the first time you...", he teases when I cut him off.

"No, actually it's my third time..."

"For how long you've been married?", he asks and I answer.

"Relax, it'll be over soon", and somehow that sentence didn't reassure me at all.

"Take off your pants and lie down", he orders me.  Oh my!

I feel queasy.  I look around.  I swallow hard.  I try to breathe.  In and out.  In and out...

I hope he won't unceremoniously chuck it inside me like it happened the first time!

I take off my pants, lie down and wait for him.  He nears me and says, "Make sure you take the pills, otherwise I won't be able to help you."

I nod.  Please do whatever you gotta do quickly!

I shut my eyes tightly and send a tiny prayer to the Almighty.  Then I feel this cold thing on my belly.

Oh! He won't get his fingers inside me then! What a relief! 

I try to peek at the monitor while he moves the transducer all over my lower belly.  I can't see anything!

"All clear.  No infections.  No cysts.  You have a normal size uterus. I'll put you on a programme and let's see how soon we can get you a baby," he finally resolves.

I let out a sigh of relief.  Thank God!  I thought my uterus was kidnapped by cysts! Now all I gotta do is to seriously quit smoking and put my womb to good use!

I want that baby, dammit!

P.S: I'm back on Blogger.  Yes, I know I suck but hey I miss you guys over at Tumblr! It's not the same without y'all! :(  Now give me a hug!! ;p


Kanwalful said...

You've been missed.

And the way you started this post made me almost go in shock. Till I found out it was just a gynae. =P

Johana Hill said...

Well it didn't take much to convince me! :p

Gnetch said...

I just realized I have a dirty mind. Hahaha!

I missed you, girl!!!

de.lizzy.cious said...

welcome back!!


MKL said...

Haha.. that was some classic Johilla :P Missed these posts actually. Not only actually, but also factually. I mean, so many stopped blogging or changed blogs and what not. It's not the same anymore. Dearie, if you leave blogger, I'm gonna shut mine down, too. :P No, not really. But plz, come back with a bag of juicy stuff and I hope a Halloween and Christmas special will be on the menu this year. What ya say?

Ps: To answer your title's question, the title should be:

"OMG, he didn't find any cysts, he only said I need to shave that George Walker B..."


Jewels Diva® said...


MKL said...

@Jewels Diva®: Hugsies back!

Johana Hill said...

Gnetch I missed you too!

de.lizzy.cious Thank you hun!

Kafka OMG! I do shave my Nina Panina! LMAO!

Jewels Thank you! Me hug you back! ;p

Daniel said...

Thank you so much for sharing it.
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John Hill said...

I want to add that I am in no way connected with Daniel and that I have no erectile dysfunction, nor do I expect any in the future.

Thank you.

John Hill, Johana's husband.

Johana Hill said...

Mayday! Mayday! Mayday! John Hill is not my husband! And my husband's parts are in perfect working order Daniel. Thank you very much!

Harini said...

Good that you are back *hug*

Brittney said...

YAY FOR BABIES! I get all mushy and gushy when it comes to babies and having them and prepping for them. I am so excited to ride this baby train with you. BEST WISHES! XOXOXO

John Hill said...

@Johana: For that comment there will be no jiggly-wiggly tonight. Grrr... bahahaha...

Benny Hill said...

Hi, I'm trying to propagate Benny Hill jokes. You were randomly awarded with one:

Dumb actress (looking down at leading man's crotch): "What is this thing called, love?"

Director: "Cut! No, it's, 'What is this thing called love?'"

Dumb actress: "What's that in the road--a head?!"

Director: "Cut! No, it's, 'What's that in the road ahead?'"

Johana Hill said...

I'm expecting Johah Hill to comment next! Ha!

Damon Hill said...

Hello. Just passing by... Btw, your blog should be change into "The", haha..

Harley said...


You'd make a terrific mommabear!

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Lindsey said...

We're not planning to try to start until next year but I'm totally afraid I'm going to end up having a hostile uterus or something crazy. :) Fingers crossed that we'll both get lucky.

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